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Written by Dan
*NOTE* - This post was supposed to be published last night, but I didn't finish it in time, and I'm too lazy to go back through and change it to a Tuesday point of view. You've been warned.
Mondays are slow, which means it's time for me to drone on about what happened this weekend.
Celebrity encounters - Over the weekend The Moxie played host to two shows for the third annual CINEmerge Film and Video Festival. On Friday, we played Jack Perez's La Cucaracha, starring Eric Roberts, who, as you probably already know, is one of the only humans alive who can claim a mutual womb with America's favorite ex-sweetheart, Mrs. Julia Roberts.
I didn't get to watch the film, so I can't say whether it was good or not, but I did have plenty of time to chat with Jack Perez, who was a really cool guy, despite his being from Los Angeles (ha ha... just kidding Sanaa). Jack opted not to watch his film, but instead spent most of his time across the street at Well Fed Head books and surfing the net in our office. He was super cool... did I already say that? He and his wife just bought a house in L.A. for an ungodly amount of money. I literally could've built SIX Moxies for the cost of a two bedroom house in Los Angeles, which begs the question: why do people really need to live in Los Angeles to be successful in the film industry? Why not take the money you'd spend on a house ($700K), invest $500K on your movie, $100K on a house in a small town like Springfield, and use the other $100K to fly back and forth between L.A. and NYC to pitch your movie? It seems ridiculous that in this technologically advanced era, you can't stay in complete touch with people in the film industry from virtually anywhere in the world.
Jack, if you're reading this, I think you and your wife should sell your new house and move to Springfield. That goes for you too, Eric Roberts.
As for William Forsythe, who was featured in THE ROCK, DICK TRACY, RAISING ARIZONA, and DEUCE BIGALOW, I don't have many things to say. Yes, he came by the theater, and yes, he strolled up and down our art hall, and yes, he waved to me while I was stuffing my face with a roast beef and turkey sandwich from Jimmy John's, but other than that... nothing. Nicole asked him if he'd stick around to take a picture with us, and he said "Sure. Absolutely. Anything for you guys." But soon after his movie ended, he was gone. I'm sure he had other places to go, so I'm not holding it against him, but I mean... come on! Why would anyone turn down a chance to have their picture taken with the world famous owners of The Moxie? He's a fool! A damned fool!
Messy, messy, cocoa puffs - There were two massively messy shows over the weekend. The first was a near sold out showing of BROKEN FLOWERS on Friday evening, so I wasn't all that surprised to find the auditorium strewn with cabbage leaves, baby diapers, and left over bits of kindling from the bonfire that was blazing near the stage. It took me nearly 20 minutes to clean up after that show... but that wasn't the worse. Oh no. Yesterday, during a 4:30 show with only 6 people, someone spilled a Diet Coke in the very last row, and I'll be damned if that sticky serum of satan didn't run all the way down to the front of the freaking stage! I was on my hands and knees scrubbing the floor with Mean Green for nearly 15 minutes. It was almost enough to make me quit. I seriously considered giving myself my two week's notice. Luckily, I talked myself out of it AND gave myself a nice raise to salve my wounds.
Nude scenes - While building up SAVING FACE last night (building up is the act of splicing together all the small reels onto one BIG reel), I managed to stop the film on the exact scene where the two main characters get naked. That may not sound too impressive, but you have to realize that the first reel holds roughly 10,000 feet of film, and the nude scene only comprises about 100 of those feet. It's like finding a needle in a haystack made up of exactly 1,000 straws of hay! Many of you are probably thinking, "I can't believe Dan is looking for nude scenes. He totally dropped down a few notches in my book. Doesn't he realize that he's running a business now, and not some seedy house of sin?" Well, to you I say: I'm a guy first, projectionist second. And I mean, COME ON, who doesn't like nude scenes? Guy or girl? Anyone? Anyone? That's what I thought.
And since we're on the subject of SAVING FACE, I'd like to alert everyone who wants to see it that 1) it's going to be a big show, so you'd be smart to swing by early and secure your tickets, and 2) there's absolutely no nudity in it (snicker snicker).
Other than that, it's been a fairly slow Monday. I'm glad I'm writing this on a Monday, because writing posts on Tuesday is totally overrated. I even wrote a haiku about it:
On a Monday evening, not
On Tuesday, thank you.