The Moxie Blog: One year old and still not listed on the National Registry of Historic Buildings
Written by Dan
One year. 365 days. 8,760 hours. 525,600 minutes. 31,536,000 seconds. That's a lot of time, my friends. You'd think I would've been able to churn out a few more than 217 posts in a year... but you're wrong. And besides, it's quality, not quantity that matters to me. In fact, in what may be the most amazing coincidence in the last 14 years, this post also marks the typing of my 100,000th word on this blog. That's a lot of words, my friends. I wonder which word will be the BIG 100K? It could be any one of these words... the pressure is killing me!!!
Let's look at it this way - here's a breakdown of literature classes based on word count:
• Micro-Fiction = up to 100 words
• Flash Fiction = 100 - 1,000 words
• Short Story = 1,000 - 7,500 words
• Novellette = 7,500 - 20,000 words
• Novella = 20,000 - 50,000 words
• Novel = 50,000 - 110,000 words
• Epics and Sequels - Over 110,000 words
So, if I printed out every post on this blog, along with all of your comments, we'd have an EPIC on our hands. An incredible story of a husband and wife team who --
WEENUS
Sorry, I wanted to make sure that the 100,000th word was a good one. I'm not sure if that was it, but I'd rather be safe than sorry.
BUNGO
Ok, so where was I? Right... this blog is an Epic. You know, I briefly considered doing an interview betwixt myself and 2004 Dan, but I decided not to since 2004 Dan isn't different enough from 2005 Dan (i.e. me) to make it funny. With that being said, I want everyone to know that I could totally take 2004 Dan if I had to. Think about it. I bet 2004 Dan can't even remember the last time he picked up a hammer. What a wuss.
Here are 10 things I had in May of 2004 that I don't have in May of 2005.
1. Cable TV
2. Regular paychecks
3. Good health and dental insurance
4. Lots of free time
5. A couch
6. A savings account... with money in it
7. Vacation time
8. The ability to eat at Taco Bell every day
9. A psychotic neighbor
10. A job I hated
Now, let's switch sides and see what I have in 2005 that I didn't in 2004
1. 100x the stress
2. A piano
3. Walking distance to a porn store
4. Hemroids... a little one
5. Cool Moxie shirt, buttons, and sticker
6. A backyard
7. An 18" core of solid concrete
8. A theater that is 65% finished
9. A savings account... with no money in it
10. A job I like (eventually)
Wee! Wasn't that fun?! And now it's time for a song:
[SPOKEN]
C’mon baby where you going?
Cos ya know I want it...
I don’t wanna blog ya to get ya
Because I want it
Cutie just slip into your Firefox-ay
And let big Dan blog ya all day
Cos the first time I saw ya
I wanted to kick it to ya
Your blog is slammin’
So honey can I bookmark ya
Cos you and I both know tricks are for kids
So get the Don Perignon outta the fridge
I wanna do the first thing that comes to mind
Cos on a scale of one to ten
No question you're a dime
I’m attracted to ya cos you blogrolled me
And sweetheart, Color Me Badd
Is gonna blog you up
Hey, beautiful lady, I need you tonight
Lovely, lovely lady
I wanna make you feel all right, yeah
I can’t deny, baby
I wanna blog you down
You are so fine, baby
All I wanna do is
(I wanna blog you up)
I want to blog you up
All night (girl you make me feel good)
I want to (let me type you down) blog you up.
Say do you feel lonely girl
Let me turn down the lights
So I can blog you in the darkness
Ooh baby, let’s read Dan's blog tonight
Yeah, dig, you read so right baby
When I blog you down
Please link me, sugar
Cause all I wanna do is
(I wanna blog you up)
I want to blog you up
All night (girl you make me feel good)
I want to (let me type you down) blog you up.
Girl you just make me feel so good
I just wanna... I just wanna
Just lay back, and enjoy the blog
All I wanna do is
(I wanna blog you up)
I want to blog you up
All night (girl you make me feel good)
I want to (let me type you down) blog you up.
Read sweet bloggin’ all night long
Feels so right it can’t be wrong
Don’t be shy girl come to me
Open up your browser and Dan will set you free
I want to blog you in all the right places, baby
I want to make blog to you
All night...
Oh yeah! It doesn't get any hotter than that. Happy Birthday Moxie Blog!!!