Hey everybody, it's NICOLE!
Written by Dan + Taken by Misc.
To keep up with the ever increasing demand for Nicole pictures, I decided to dedicate an entire phlog to my favorite Dr. Mario opponent. For those of you who keep up with Nicole's blog, Tapioca Dance and Fresh as Paint, these photos won't be new to you, but for the rest of you... be prepared to be taken aback by the beauty and elegance that is... NICOLE!
NOTE: I also snatched a few photos from the twin's blog - Cinco Drive. Hi Stephy!
Nicole is more camera shy than the famed Ivory-beaked woodpecker, but on occasion she'll take a picture like this, as if she were saying, "Here I am world, but you can't have all of me. No, no. Not yet. Instead, gaze upon my husband's retainer case and be content."
Here we find Nicole showing off her amazing 1/64 carat wedding ring. The stone is so magnificient that it can't be seen! Amazing! There's some turtle wax down there too. Will we ever see Nicole? The suspense is killing me!!!
What's this? I'm not sure. That's Nickey's eye...
Yet another mysterious shot of the phantom photographer... the woman behind the camera.
When she's not taking wonderful photos, Nicole also likes to sew cute little aprons. Once she's finished sewing one of her textile masterpieces, she says, "Dan, will you come take a picture of me and my new apron?" To which I reply, "Uh, something something blog. Something something computer. Blah blah blah Tetris." So Nicole sighes, takes a picture of herself in the mirror, and I end up feeling like the world's biggest douche bag.
It's hard to believe that she makes these out of curtains and pillow cases. Seriously... it's hard to believe. Try for yourself.
I think this was one of her first aprons. She wears it from time to time... like when she's cooking, eating, cleaning, writing a blog entry, watching TV, reading, sleeping, or showering.
These were the shoes that Nicole wore to Stephanie's wedding two weeks ago. Aren't they purty?!
This is what Nicole looks like after she takes a whiff of my dark beer. D-R-U-N-K! Ha ha! Just kidding... she's not drunk, she's totally wasted! I'm sure she'll set the story straight in the comments.
Mmmm, Bjork. That's the cutest Halloween costume of all time - hands down... my pants!!! Ha ha ha. I'm sorry. That was wrong.
No, she's not having a violent coughing fit... she's DANCING! When Nicole dances, she swivels her hips back and forth, pumps her arms up and down, and makes that funny grunting noise like Ricky Gervais did on The Office when he danced. Don't remember? Here's a clip. Perfick.
Here's Nicole feeding "pretend hay" to Harlem, Nicole's mom's horsey.
And here's Joel, my new brother-in-law, flanked by the twins. Do you see the way Nickey (on the right) is looking at him? She never looks at me like that. GEEZ!
In a desperate bid to be chosen as participants on one of those "What Not To Wear" shows on TLC, Nicole and her friend Melissa tried to look as haggard as possible for the camera. Having been born without fashion sense, I think they look fine.
This is Nicole scraping wallpaper trim from the wall of our guest bedroom. THE END!
In conclusion, Nicole is an alright gal. I'd love for her to be in more phlogs, but that would mean 1) I'd have to take the pictures, which I'm not very good at, and 2) Nicole would have to be willing to have her picture taken, which she's not very good at. Don't worry though, I'll keep working with her until she gets to the point where she can have her picture taken with a Dr. Pepper in her pants and a smile on her face... mmm, Dr. Pepper.
